One day I
truly lost my cool and began yelling at my husband, Alan. Don’t even remember
what it was about. All of a sudden, I
saw myself blowing up like a huge balloon while Alan was shrinking, getting
smaller. I realized that I was taking up way too much space! The phrase, “no
more than my space, no less than my place” came into my mind. I also heard the sentence: “Anger starts in
madness and ends in regret.” Both these phrases helped me calm down and
apologize profusely. This visceral education in humility/Anavah was in part due
to Rabbi Andrea Goldstein’s monthly Tikkkun Middot (Repair of Character) classes
where we learned Mindfulness Meditation. Also this past year I was in a Mussar
class taught by Cyndee Levy, a CAJE teacher. We studied with a partner about one
Middah, character trait, such as anger and practiced how to improve ourselves.
I will be
downsizing and moving to a smaller, one story home in September. I am finished
with decluttering my belongings and sold my house. This month of Elul will
afford me the opportunity to practice some of the things I learned this past
year: being in silence, meditating, writing, and paying closer attention to the
character traits I want to improve.
This
quote at the bottom of my email “The art of living lies in
a fine mingling of letting go and holding on,” by Havelock Ellis,
matches the Institute for Jewish Spirituality’s theme for Elul which is “Letting Go.” What a
surprise…it seems that I am surrounded by this concept! There must be much
emet, or truth in these words.
I am a work
in progress and hope to continue to learn how to be a human BEING, not a human
DOING.
Sharon Weissman
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Great Quote & blog post.
ReplyDelete~Jan Fishman